Pregnancy comes with a lot of decisions. Which provider should you choose? Where will you deliver? What classes should you take? And somewhere along the way, many moms in my area hear about a Maryland doula and wonder if they’re worth considering. Before I became a mom, I had heard that word “doula” plenty of times. Friends recommended hiring one, and birth educators talked about them. But if I’m being honest, I wasn’t completely convinced I needed one myself. I already had midwives I trusted, and my husband planned to be by my side. Was hiring a doula really necessary?
Looking back now, I can confidently say that working with a doula was one of the best decisions I made during my pregnancy. In this post, I’m sharing my experience, what my doula actually did, and what I think every expecting mother should know before deciding whether a doula is right for her.
A little disclaimer: I was fortunate to have the birth experience I wanted, but every pregnancy is different. Sometimes your birth doesn’t go as you planned, and sometimes, moms want different things in their birth, and all of that is great! This story is about what I wanted and how my doula helped me with my preferences. Okay, let’s get to the good stuff!
What Is a Maryland Doula, Exactly?
This is a big question that gets asked often. I will mention a doula during maternity shoots, and most often, people don’t know what I am talking about! Merriam-Webster’s definition of a doula is a person trained to provide advice, information, emotional support, and physical comfort to a mother before, during, and just after childbirth. So keep in mind, they do not provide medical help. They are there to keep the mama comfortable, tend to her needs, and step in when it is right.
What is the difference between a birth doula and a postpartum doula?
A birth doula walks through your pregnancy with you, supports you at birth, and helps in postpartum just after birth. The postpartum doula comes to your home in the days, weeks, or months after birth and helps you settle in at home, take care of Mom and baby, and occasionally can help with household tasks as agreed upon. Postpartum doulas in Maryland also helping with recovery, feeding, infants care, and more.
Why are more mothers hiring doulas in Maryland?
Maryland mothers use doulas because they want personalized, continuous support during birth (a life-changing experience!). While doctors and nurses provide excellent medical care, a doula focuses entirely on the mother’s emotional well-being, physical comfort, education, and encouragement throughout pregnancy, labor, and the postpartum period. For Baltimore families, another benefit is working with someone who understands the local birth community, including area hospitals, birth centers, healthcare providers, and family resources. Having this local knowledge can help mothers feel more confident and supported as they prepare for birth and the postpartum weeks that follow.
Why I Decided to Hire a Maryland Doula
Here is my thought process laid out, and hopefully this resonates with some people!
I wanted a natural birth. I’ve heard horror stories about the epidural, and I’d rather not risk the extra dangers if I didn’t need to. Learning that pain is 20% physical and 80% mental, it was almost like a challenge to me. How long could I go without needing extra medical assistance? This sounds crazy. Of course, I wanted a healthy baby, so if I needed medical assistance, I would take it. My husband helped me to remember to hang onto my desires with a loose grip because we don’t know what will happen; we’ve never done this before!
Because we have never done this (birth) before, I knew I wanted someone else there who had the experience. I was nervous that my husband would see me wince in pain in a way he’s never seen before, or make a noise he’s never heard from me, and rush us straight to the hospital before necessary. Obviously, doulas are in the birth space all the time. They see over dozens of births each year, so they know what to look out for! If I had a doula in my home watching my behavior, she would for sure know when the right time to go to the hospital would be.
Ultimately, I wanted someone who could help guide my husband on how to best take care of me. Someone to teach him how to give me comfort in the pain. Someone who didn’t move my husband out of the way, but encouraged him to encourage me! And that’s the start of hiring my doula, Jenn Racer, from Jenn Racer Doula Services.
What My Doula Actually Did During Pregnancy and Birth
In all honesty, this section might be a little hazy. During birth, I tried to stay in my own headspace (aka Labor Land), so this is from what I remember.
Pregnancy with a Maryland Doula
We had at least one prenatal meeting (maybe 2?). Regardless, before birth, I felt completely prepared going into it, thanks to Jenn. During one of our prenatal meetings, she started by asking my husband and me about ourselves, then turned to my husband and asked questions like, “What is your immediate response when you see her in any form of pain?” This was weird, but I saw what she was getting at. She was understanding where her role needed to be, did she need to assist me more or assist my husband in assisting me? What did we want?
She went over calming techniques, breathing exercises, Lamaze techniques, using a rebozo, and more. The class was extremely helpful because when it came time for birth in the early stages, my husband and I tried a couple of suggestions that Jenn recommended and found some that truly worked in that moment. The partner support was huge. We truly valued that aspect of the class.
She also went over hospital expectations and what to be prepared for as situations arise. She used words like epidural, cervical check, fetal monitoring, etc. This was great, because then we were able to start developing our birth plan and signs to look out for if we knew birth was slowing down or an epidural was about to be recommended.
Postpartum with a Maryland Doula
After birth, Jenn stayed with us for as long as we needed. She helped me establish breastfeeding in the first hour and really helped with a couple of techniques. Jenn also took some pictures! They’re physical memories of the birth, which I will cherish forever. One other thing she did for us was crowd control. When I didn’t know what I wanted regarding my family coming in to meet our new baby, she helped establish a cut-off time and continued to check in with me as the time passed. When it was time to be moved to the Mother-Baby unit, she grabbed our overnight bags from our car and met us there. After settling, she stayed a bit longer to see if we needed anything else, and we told her we were good!
Maybe one week later, she came to our home and checked in with us, asking postpartum questions, talking about the birth, and was just an overall calming and reassuring presence during the time of chaos as new parents. Never judging us for our parent preferences or asserting any advice where it wasn’t asked. She was a great listener!
4 Things That Surprised Me About Working With a Maryland Doula
My Husband Felt More Supported
In a place my husband (or I) had never been before, our doula helped him feel confident. This was extremely helpful because he was able to help me without fear. We have grown closer from this experience, thanks to our doula!
I Felt More Confident Asking Questions
Sometimes it’s easy to just go with what the doctors say because they know best, but sometimes what they know isn’t what is necessary. When a decision needed to be made, I was able to ask, “What are the benefits? What are the risks? Are there any alternatives?” I would not have been confident to do that if it weren’t for Jenn.
We Felt Like a Team During Labor
Me, Jenn, and my husband! They both switched back and forth, caring for me. My husband knows me, and Jenn knows birth. With those two factors, we had the dream team.
The Support Continued After Birth
The crowd control, texting her with questions once we were home from the hospital, the postpartum check-in. The support didn’t stop once baby was out! I am super thankful for the confidence Jenn gave me and my husband throughout her whole Birth Support package.
Is Hiring a Maryland Doula Worth It?
Hiring a good doula is worth it. If you want extra support on mom, someone who will help advocate for you in the unexpected, and someone who encourages both the dad and the mom? Yes, hire the doula!!!
Obviously, you don’t know what having a doula is going to look like practically in birth quite yet, but here are a few questions to help keep you confident when you’re making the decision.
Questions to Ask Before Hiring a Maryland Doula
The right doula is often less about experience alone and more about whether her approach aligns with your goals. Read that again.
1. What is your philosophy on birth and postpartum support?
2. What services are included in your doula package?
3. How do you support partners during labor?
4. What happens if you’re unavailable when I go into labor?
5. How would you describe your support style? Can you walk me through a labor in your eyes?
Also, look at reviews online! This helps you understand the doula from other people’s perspectives.
My Final Thoughts
Hiring a Maryland doula is ultimately about investing in support during one of your biggest transitions in life. As you prepare for your baby’s arrival, consider how you’d like to preserve these memories as well. From the anticipation of pregnancy to the joy of welcoming your newborn, these fleeting moments deserve to be remembered. If you’re searching for maternity or newborn photography in Maryland, I’d be honored to help tell that part of your story. Contact me today to start the conversation!
